MENTHOL UNIVERSITY PRESS

When In Doubt

2012-01-22T14:18:00.000-08:00

I was actually planning on buying one of these (they retailed for about $120) but then I noticed they had been discontinued. Damn. You can buy them on eBay et al., used, for about $500, but I'm not going to do that.

Click to view larger.

Peas out.

Two Thieves (A True Story)

2012-01-22T02:34:00.000-08:00

Two Thieves (A True Story)

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I think you're an engineer--an electrical engineer, or computer science, something like that.

I think you went to Berkeley, and I think I wanted to show you goodwill--a Berkeley man and a Stanford man. I think I wanted to show you I thought the rivalry was foolish, and I think you would have agreed.

I think you're older than me--I'm nearly sure, actually. I think you're not thirty yet, but damn close.

I said to you: “Au Voleur, Au Voleur!” I struck your shoulder with the back of my open hand to get your attention, and I said it again: “Au Voleur!”

“You're fucked up?,” you replied.

I wasn't; I was cleanblooded as hell, and I think you were also. In your defense, it was loud, loud as hell.

I think you didn't hear me warn you, but I think--I think you'll find out, if you don't know. And I think you don't know, not in January, not today.

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Peas out.

Two Frames, One Symmetrical

2012-01-15T21:47:00.000-08:00

Here are two "bleak" frames. We need to reach a decision on which is bleaker (like the street). Click to view larger.
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We seek out symmetry; we like to look at objects with visible lines or planes of symmetry. If you show someone a scene, they'll first look for human faces, then for motion, then for symmetry. This man was sitting alone on the edge of a fountain outside the Louvre, and had positioned himself right between two tall cans of beer. If you look carefully, you can see tabs sticking up above the rims of both cans; both are open. I wonder if he was careful to drink them at the same rate, such that similar amounts of beer remained in each can at any given time.
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This man was wearing a shirt with the phrase "I Love Men" corrected to "I Love Me." In my mind, this is equivalent to wearing a shirt with the phrase "I Am Homosexual" with the word "Homosexual" crossed out and replaced with "Narcissistic." This seems fairly offensive, insofar as it could be seen as carrying the message "Gay men are narcissistic." Quite bizarre.
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Peas Out. Enjoy 2012. I've the impression that 2011 was rough--not on me in particular, but for most people I know. I'm a bit of a h8r, but still I don't enjoy watching my generation be robbed.

-L

Foreclosure (A True Story)

2012-01-02T09:10:00.000-08:00

"Foreclosure" (A True Story)

The Art Dealer's house--
The biggest, oldest house in Oakland,
Or the oldest big house,
Or the biggest old house--
Was full of those Hanson sculptures,
Photorealistic, life-size, entirely convincing sculptures of men and women,
Unsettling enough in a gallery,
Worse by far in a home, where they'd be easy to mistake.
You walk into the living room:
"Oh, hello there, sir--do excuse me."

The bank will have it soon enough,
But he's good at dragging his feet--
Five years, it might be--
Twenty-sixteen, and I'm sorry for the man who drills out the lock.
The sculptures will be covered by dust,
Scare the Hell from him.

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Peas Out.

Sarah (A True Story)

2011-12-29T23:41:00.000-08:00

Sarah (A True Story)

We were having our quiet time.

"You're beautiful," I told you.

"Be more specific," you demanded.

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Peas out.

new work from california

2011-12-14T11:03:00.001-08:00

HOLIDAY PARTY 2011

2011-12-13T13:50:00.001-08:00

WHAT DO U GUYS WANT TO DO?

I'LL BE IN IN TOWN

DOWN TO GET LOOSE

DOWN TO CHILL

best albums of 2011

2011-12-08T09:50:00.001-08:00

best albums of 2011

1. the weekend

2. pictureplane

3. deestroyer

4. girls

5. salem

6. washed out

7. kanye

8. drake

9. lil wayne (sorry for the wait tape)

10. araabmuzik

11. action bronson

12. danny brown

13. hood internet - trillwave 2

14. lil b

- erik stinson december 8, 2011

Preview of Occupy Oakland

2011-11-29T20:35:00.000-08:00

As y'all know, "Occupy Oakland" was basically a big fashion show.
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Click to view larger. She had hella holes in her shirt, I had to photoshop them all closed.

Peas Out / V4L

P.S. I'm "cautiously pessimistic" that "deep security" can be overcome.

Pogh-ums

2011-11-07T13:57:00.001-08:00

http://htmlgiant.com/random/a-survey-of-90s-early-internet-love-poetry/#disqus_thread

Expertise

2011-11-03T13:24:00.000-07:00

Bro has expertise in "general academic wrongdoing." Hmm.
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Click to view larger:

Alameda

2011-10-23T20:44:00.000-07:00

“Alameda” (A Short Pogh-Hymn)

Champagne. No corkscrew: so, champagne.

“The most important thing about opening champagne is to do it slow and not shake it.”

“And the second most important thing is to open it upside-down and spray it all over Dale Earnhardt. Or whoever wins NASCAR.”

“That's so trashy.”

“I know.”

Alameda.

“I see it! Volvo Volkswagen!”

Instead of correcting you like the asshole I am (“It's a Volvo Station Wagon; a Volkswagen is a make of car. From the German: Volk—meaning people—and Wagen—car”), I contented myself by thinking about how a Volvo Volkswagen would come to be.

Someone's driving a Volvo on 880 North at 80 miles an hour.

Someone's driving a Volkswagen on 880 South at 80 miles an hour.

One of them swerves through a break in the median. Head-on collision at 160 miles per hour: Volvo Volkswagen. It's mine. One-of-a-kind. No one else in the world owns a Volvo Volkswagen.

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I've got to move to San Francisco, or to the East Bay. This is the first time I've felt any attachment at all to a physical place, the first time I've had any sense of home, the first time I've cared enough about where I live and the people I know that I wouldn't immediately pack up and move anywhere in the world for ten cents more an hour.

Peas out.

V4L.

Sleep Deprivation

2011-10-07T09:42:00.000-07:00

I am severely regretting attending a liberal arts college and continuing to pursue Computer Engineering. Coding is a skill I posess and apparently it is hard for other people. All advisors / mentors / people who know stuff and things have brainwashed me into thinking that a well rounded liberal arts education and a complete knowledge of the entire computer system is important to being employable. For the kind of work I want to do it is completely unnecessary.

Minus meeting a lovely girlfriend I wish I had gone to some nerd school to nerd out with nerds and stuff.

My partner for an embedded systems class is a good salesman. We had a cigarette and I asked him about splitting the workload for a project. He told me that his girlfriend of four years left him last week and now not only does he have to raise his seven year old daughter alone, but he also has to take care of her stupid cat for a couple weeks. I did the project on my own.

Provocative Saturday night coming soon...

MC1R Double Recessive

2011-10-06T19:45:00.000-07:00

I've recently been shooting with a Hasselblad 500 C/M, a 1957 medium-format camera. It takes 120 film, which is somewhat similar to IMAX 65mm film except it's reel-to-reel. IMAX has little sprocket holes on the sides like 35mm stock, while 120 doesn't.

This was at the SF bluegrass festival. Bro had inserted a quartz crystal into the brim of his hat so that he could simultaneously shade his eyes and utilize the mystic powers of the crystal.

Click to view larger.

Peas out.

2011-10-06T12:48:00.001-07:00

Steve Jobs

2011-10-05T17:58:00.000-07:00

Oh dear, oh dear, dear, dear.

Click to view larger.

Rest in Peas.

I thought that all you had to do was believe in bullshit but apparently there's other bullshit involved as well

2011-10-05T14:50:00.000-07:00

Subway

2011-10-04T15:25:00.000-07:00

I went to Subway today to get a sandwich. Behind me was a short, skinny, bookish-looking Korean woman of about 30. She asked for venison on her sandwich. So hot.

Most recent article at the Atlantic

2011-10-03T06:42:00.000-07:00

http://www.theatlantic.com/life/archive/2011/10/finding-love-on-the-internet-dating-in-the-age-of-the-profile-image/245915/

(there is a comment battle going on)

HAPPY HOUR

2011-09-29T08:05:00.000-07:00

Midtown Skin Essay Series by Erik Stinson Parts 1-5
WINTER 2011-2012

1. Happy Hour

The sound from exhaling smoke is everywhere. People breath with their hearts as rain clouds come from New Jersey. But they do not fall. The sky is gray and empty of a future. Women cruise through revolving doors into catalogs of private romance. Men linger with their fantasies for a moment, on the curb, outside of the brokerage firm. The bosses wait together for their car service, placing bets on who will fuck at the VP afterlounge. Lincolns in line stretch down the blocks past marble stairs and hedges. These cars are thick and black and they do not forgive. At this hour, corporate art can sneak into our souls. The markets change over to Asia. All through Manhattan, the people are killing their day lives. Captains of Industry are embracing their moment of blindness, at the intersection of work and sex. Everyone follows a different path to the gratification called home.

Some people go together to place their faith in beer and bar food. On a Samsung LED, the Yankees play a team that will lose to market forces. Music plays from the American South and West. Many of these people are not from New York. They simulate townlife by drinking and talking of old friends. They sit in booths, just blocks away from the places they work - the places that crushed their past lives into a dust of wealth and ambition. But it’s best not to think about American history. The future is ahead. These people drink the happy hour special. They share bowls with straws. Some pair off to watch network television and have missionary sex. Their night ends with vodka, pizza, and small, comfortable apartments.

Other people use happy hour to go inward. They do not want to disappear into meat. These are the killers and the poets of Wall St. The legends of Madison avenue. They are afraid of not dying. They are afraid of what they have already become, of the things that New York has made them. Their Happy Hour is a feeling. A round smooth surface. It comes quickly as the last major transaction of the day has been completed. The heat is off. The money is cool. It’s time to reflect. Outside the office, the world rapidly changes, business changes, personalities refract into a patternless mosaic of style and influence. These people will relax for a few hours before they take the New York nightworld by the throat, and choke her until she feels alive again. Happy hour, for these Midtown agents, means checking social stocks. Private relationship investing. Fashion. Art. Music. Manipulation. Disappearance. Emptiness. These are the Happy Hour themes of the Second Happy Hour. The settings is a quiet place. A nice bar. A terrace. A Xanex and a half sleep - until the shower and the new set of clothes and the infinite world of lights and faces.

The last kind of Happy Hour is the insurgent. It is not characterized by cruel sensuality or calculated blankness. This Happy Hour is everywhere in the world - but it starts in Midtown. This is the truly and purely empty hour. The hour that sucks away life, that invades feeling with matte black pain, numbness. This is the resttime for the already-dead. It is beyond race and class. Experience this Hour by simply slipping out of your own optimism. Lounge naked in the darkness or your dim room, thinking of time and wealth. Catch this Happy Hour in the faces of anyone you see, walking home alone or in pathetic pairs. This hour is the non-analysis of the fear economist. His conclusion: that the world is ending, that the economy is ending. He sips dread. He feeds on raw market data. His teeth are the Internet. He does not need comedy or tragedy to understand his workday. He is the headless totem of the deeply fucked. This last Happy Hour is the economy of certain destruction, without purpose or meaning.

Coming soon:

2. Index Fund
3. Lunch Hour
4. Job Market
5. Captains of Industry

Cleaning

2011-09-28T03:07:00.001-07:00

So I went through my old posts... That was bad. Anyway, I thought this deserved to live:

Here's some sex advice. Be smart. Help girls with homework. Have sex with said girls.

A new holiday

2011-09-27T09:00:00.000-07:00

How old is Menthol? For sure we need to have a party on the silver/gold anniversaries.

Click to view larger.

Into Debt, Into Danger

2011-09-16T09:43:00.001-07:00

"Into Debt, Into Danger"

Click below to view larger.

Starless Starless Night

2011-09-14T23:11:00.001-07:00

Six frames off a 35mm. roll of Neopan SS (same as Neopan 100, same speed, you process it at the same temperature with the same chemicals, Fuji just changed the name for no reason).

Click to view larger.
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1. "Escape Artist In Baseball Cap"

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"Woman, Bay Street"
It's a damn good thing she was wearing a headband. It's often very difficult to focus on people with light-colored skin and light-colored eyebrows otherwise.

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"Even Sweep The Roads To Get There"
There's an American Apparel on every University Avenue in the United States, and the University Avenue leading to Stanford is no mistake. I shot this on my bike on my way home for work. This is how I typically dress when doing streetsweeping. This one's for Erik, of course.

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"Cat On The Morning Of His Death"

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"London, First And Last"

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"Starless, Starless Night"

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Peas out,

-A2

Carefully cropped

2011-09-13T11:42:00.001-07:00

Man with G+T hat. This isn't my frame; I saw it on the Internet. It's recent, no older than 1 month. I cropped it; it was in severe, abject, desperate need of cropping.

Click below to view larger.

Peas/G's-and-T's Out.

The Fox And The Redbull

2011-09-11T23:55:00.000-07:00

Below are two pogh-hymns, one of which is trademark-infringing.

RED BULL GIVES YOU HANDCUFFS.

On the topic of hymns, I've been going to services recently.

Click below to view full size.

1. "The Fox And The Redbull":

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2. "Fuck You":

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My 2 cents on Sense Europa:

-Writing kicks ass.

-Photos are too hard-core and low-fi for my tastes. Get more "fi", less "core". I don't have anything against sexually-charged photographs*, but some of the frames are a bit too in-your-face for my tastes. People are acquisitive (i.e. they like to acquire and inquire, take things and examine them). A good photo invites you to look closer, rather than jumping you.

*Actually, I do, because I think they're trite, and I don't understand the point of pornography. Sex can't be enjoyed vicariously, any more than food can. That said, pornography and the Cooking Chanel remain popular.

Peas Out,

-A2

Roller Disco Memorial

2011-09-10T01:43:00.000-07:00

Gonna get all dressed up and have a couple beers at the San Francisco September 11th Memorial Outdoor Roller Disco.

NEVER FORGET.

Click to view larger.

Only Staying For A Quarter Of It

2011-09-03T23:10:00.000-07:00

"Only Staying For A Quarter Of It" - K.

Click to view larger.
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Peas/beans out.

Ford and Microsoft Collaborate to Offer Cloud-Based Vehicle Infotainment

2011-09-02T15:02:00.000-07:00

The highlighting is added, but this is a real published paper, unfortunately.

I think Ford and Microsoft should first learn how to build reliable engines and software (respectively) before collaborating on this...

Click to view larger.

mentholiday, mentholocaust

2011-08-30T11:57:00.000-07:00

See below. Click to view larger.

Keeping Up w the Kardashians

2011-08-22T10:59:00.000-07:00

I've misspelled Kim's name, I think.

Click to view larger.

Using data to fight political violence.

2011-08-15T20:34:00.000-07:00

Saw this. Love the photograph. This bro is so into using data to beat the shit out of political violence.

Click to view larger.

Right

2011-08-04T16:02:00.000-07:00

Click to view larger. I'm pretty sure this must be a joke. I can't actually believe that there are any jobs out there for freelance writers.

Suppose you were applying for this job- what would you send in as a "portfolio of your work"? If it included a suicide note, then the employer would know you don't follow through, and no one wants to fucking hire someone like that.

All The Right Reasons

2011-07-26T14:25:00.000-07:00

Click to view full size.

Also, I'm moving. Not too far, yet, probably.

NYC UPDATE BY ERIK

2011-07-26T10:45:00.001-07:00

Long Story

2011-07-22T13:51:00.000-07:00

1. “Palo Alto”

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“Are you allergic to peanuts?”

“No. I’m not allergic to any-“

Six hours.

Gin-and-tonic.

One hour.

Another gin-and-tonic to pass the time until the Santa Clara County district court grants Mark Zuckerberg a restraining order against me. Behind me, two men are speaking. I can’t hear much. I hear the word “percent.”

“You don’t know, or you’re not at liberty?”

“A little of both.”

from the internet

2011-07-12T02:25:00.001-07:00

yep.

Unretouched Proofs: Streets of Paris

2011-07-11T03:00:00.000-07:00

Far, far too much more to come. Most of the Paris frames are from the streets and parks of the City where street was born. Also:

-Some frames from Maastrict (about half from the train station East of the Meuse and half from the streets, primarily along the West bank of the Meuse and in the city center).

-Some frames from Liège (entirely from the Guillemins train station).

-Stories, including one about a peculiar gentleman from Finland whose sole reason for visiting Paris was making a pilgrimage to Jim Morrison's grave. Sketch y'all.

Click to view larger.
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Peas out.
V4l.
-A2.

Hipster Cop

2011-06-21T11:57:00.001-07:00

Self-explanatory.

I didn't notice, until after I developed this, that the hipster-cop has one hand on his pistol. It's chill though. Hipsters and cops are probably two of the least threatening categories of people.

Hipster glasses (dark, thin frames with untinted lenses or no lenses) are great aids to focusing.

Click to see larger.

The Fountain Problem

2011-06-16T07:09:00.000-07:00

Does Stanford chlorinate its fountains because people swim in them, or do people swim in them because Stanford chlorinates them?

While you're thinking about that, here's two things to look at. Click to view larger:

1. "Newports"

I shot this somewhere around Oak and Divisidero (probably further West on Oak by a few blocks) downtown. Black-and-white film, scanned, colorized in Photoshop. She could be the Menthol covergirl.

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2. "The American"

This isn't mine; I found it on the internet. Despite my distaste for posed photography generally, I think this is well-done. Photographing fire is difficult because flames are hard to focus on given that they have low contrast and no consistent polarization. Flames don't reflect light (much) so you can't photograph them with flash- you have to use long exposures, which you can't usually use with people because people can't hold still. Somehow, someone pulled this frame off without focus/blur/exposure/homeland security problems. My guess is that this was shot wide-angle.

Peas out y'all.

re social media

2011-06-14T00:06:00.001-07:00

http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6507690/hardly-working-start-up-guys

Falling Man (A Pogh-Hymn)

2011-05-29T20:01:00.000-07:00

“Falling Man”

My confession: When you fell forward
and didn’t put your hands out to catch yourself-
fell forward into the black wet shine of the street-
my first thought was this-
hopelessly selfish:

I would never have the chance to tell you
that you were right- you had called it-
I was turning soft, that just this morning
I let someone drink in my car, and he wasn’t even
a diabetic gulping apple juice, anything to raise
his blood sugar after an insulin overdose-
no, he wasn’t diabetic, and there was no medical reason for it-
he was just thirsty, and I let him drink, in my car-
not even something clear: Chai tea, or something-
hopelessly hip, sweet, expensive- I let him drink it-
there might even have been milk in it-
I can’t remember- I finished it, but by then
it was cold, tasteless.

After, I cried because I’d never tell you this-
and you-
you truly listen, while I-
I only wait to speak.

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I ran across a website which contains some very good photographs, photographs that don't lean on anything.

http://www.evandroteixeira.net/

I think the site is in Portuguese.

2011-05-26T09:11:00.001-07:00

Bring Her Down by Deep Spice Nine

Eleven Sixty-Seven, Parts IV and V

2011-05-22T21:44:00.000-07:00

Eleven Sixty-Seven, Part IV

Today the street is closed
for Russian-American Appreciation Day or Something
and I almost called you to ask
you to come here for
Russian-American Appreciation Day or Something
until I remembered
you are Ukrainian, not Russian.

I’ve called you Russian enough times. Is that
bad? Do the Ukrainians
have beef with the Russians? Really, who doesn’t.
Really- the Russians are nearly as bad as we are,
as I am,
Really.

Russia. Snow, the Cold War, Ballet-
Did I tell you I finally saw Black Swan? It was
not too good- not as good as seeing a ballet-
but much cheaper. I didn’t like it-
now I am afraid
to go to the ballet. The time-lapse
photography in Black Swan- that was well-done.
Else,
rare-
at least it ought to be.

But you aren’t Russian, and we remind
each the other of each the other so much we make each the other
sick-
you especially intimidate me-
you are
a few years older, tall, handsome, your blond hair and beard, strong-
the Russian in those art deco propaganda posters, truly-
you make real money, and in a few years perhaps
I’ll make real money, but I’ll never be tall, handsome, strong,
as you are- but I will always
be Russian.

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Eleven Sixty-Seven, Part V

NO PARKING
24 HRS 7 DAYS

VEHICLES WILL BE
TICKETED, TOWED,
OR STOLEN
AT OWNER’S EXPENSE

SUPERFOG ROLLS IN

2011-05-19T07:44:00.000-07:00

SUPERFOG ROLLS IN

can i get it in the mornin

like times when i get to

work and think about what

im gonna do later but there

is nothing else. just

white space.

looking out across the

hudson river is a mirage

of america. its not america,

its a river next to a

financial center.

and for some reason i can

only think about what it

would be like to take lives

for a living, through it seems

like not a good job. there

is some romance in killing

people yourself.

in a silent fog next to

a great river i emerge

as from the fires of a

quiet comfortable hell.

i glide like a boat or a

dream with a firearm

attached to me. and

finally i slip into a dark

compound and end

whatever thing living

there might have

been making me

feel unhappy, cutting

the world again, making

smaller pieces for

us to try and see.

Another Glass Of Water

2011-05-18T17:52:00.000-07:00

These here are funny things from the internets. Does hitting the Print Screen key count as brotography?

Click to View Larger:
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Boss

2011-05-13T21:04:00.001-07:00

Note: These photographs are not mine. I've never shot underwater; I've heard it's difficult, especially as far as lighting is concerned.
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1.

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2.

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3.

Skool

2011-05-10T14:51:00.000-07:00

found

2011-05-10T13:38:00.001-07:00

Eleven-Sixty-Seven Continued

2011-05-08T19:40:00.000-07:00

These are continuations of a poghem whose first portion appears here:

http://mentholuniversitypress.blogspot.com/2011/03/eleven-sixty-seven-poghem.html

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“Eleven-Sixty-Seven, Part II”

I don’t think I told you I was thirsty-
I think you asked, and I’m sure I said I was-
but, in any case, you said:
“well, let’s see what there is,”
walked across the hardwood to your refrigerator,
opened it.

I stood slackjawed- I’d never imagined
that anyone could have a refrigerator so full-
or containing so many different items-
as to be unsure of what was,
so
to
speak,
in stock.

Slackjawed- so that even
after you said:
“water, coke, wine, lemonade, orange juice- orange juice, or, I think, grapefruit juice, or something…”
it took me seconds
to ask for
a glass of water
with ice.

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“Eleven-Sixty-Seven, Part III”

When you wouldn’t walk with me- too cold, too far, you said, though it wasn’t either- we went home. You told me you were sorry for being such a pussy- you used that word- and I shrugged.
I told you to practice walking in the cold, further and further- half a block, a full block, and so on- not that it’s every really cold in San Francisco (I didn’t say that).

“Growing up, you know, I never liked tomatoes. Not at all. I liked ketchup, of course.”

“Well, everyone does. I mean, I don’t think that’s too rare. Too uncommon. I like tomatoes, though. And that reminds me, you have to help me move my tomatoes outside when they get too big for their pots- dig the holes in the back yard for moving them outside.”

“Mmm. Yeah, I will. They get big. I remember they got big when my parents grew them, and that was near Seattle. Do they get bigger in California?”

“Probably, I guess. Everything grows so well here. I mean, did you see my daddy's place? All the lettuce? And it would be even bigger if the bugs weren't eating it.”

“Well, growing up, I hated tomatoes. I’d never eat them, I’d pick them off burgers, out of salads. But I practiced. Gradually, you know. I forced myself to eat them, starting- probably two, three years ago. In college. I’d cut them up into tiny pieces, swallow them whole to keep from tasting them. Usually with some lemonade or cranberry juice or something. Not milk, obviously. And in a few months, I was able to take the flavor more. I started chewing them, started eating bigger pieces. Quarter slices, half slices, full circle slices, and now- I don’t love tomatoes, but I can eat them just like anyone else. Normally. I wouldn’t just bite into a tomato.”

“Oh, I would.”

“I could, though. If I had to. It’s about being polite. You go to someone’s place, you eat what they serve you. You could do the same with being cold.”

“I just- I’ve never done anything like that. I’ve never felt motivated to do anything like that.”

That’s why I can’t love you. I can’t force myself to, I can’t learn to. It isn’t like tomatoes. I’m not that strong.

Does it matter? We can still have dinner- I want to, still. I enjoyed dinner, enjoyed my chicken salad, even though there were tomatoes in it. Three circles of tomato, if I remember. They were thin. But that doesn’t matter.

I wish I loved you, I wish I could. Of course. But, gimme what you got. Isn’t that what’s written on the Statue of Liberty?

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Peas out y’all.

A few nights ago, I went to a party and ran into this guy who is just as into Bruce Springsteen as I am. I told him “Dude, this guy I went to high school with is dating Bruce Springsteen’s daughter.” He said “Woah, that’s awesome. I bet his daughter is hot, because he [Bruce] probably has a hot wife. And, I mean, he’s not a bad looking guy himself, if you know what I mean.” We then talked about Bruce Springsteen for 20 to 40 minutes.

Also, apparently Dustin Ha. is in cooking school.

V4L,

-A2

this is where i work now, building far right

2011-04-29T11:59:00.000-07:00

Late April Pogh-Hymns

2011-04-25T12:52:00.000-07:00

Here are two pogh-hymns for Easter:

+++

1. “Wonder”
Thousands of times I’ve wondered:
What is making that noise?
Half a dozen times, I’ve found it to be
Myself.

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2. “Outside”
Outside the Seven Eleven
On the road that runs perpendicular
To Middlefield
Two bums are discussing the Royal Wedding
And forget
To ask me for change.

+++

Peas out.

graphics

2011-04-13T09:16:00.001-07:00

Teeth (A Short Poghem)

2011-04-12T20:27:00.000-07:00

Here is a short poghem for y'all. It was partially inspired by an article entitled "Traumatic Injuries of the Lips and Tongue" as featured on the Colgate Oral and Dental Health Resource Center. For some reason, a link to this appeared on Thought Catalog:

http://www.colgate.com/app/CP/US/EN/OC/Information/Articles/Oral-and-Dental-Health-Basics/Dental-Emergencies/Dental-Emergencies/article/Traumatic-Injuries-of-the-Lips-and-Tongue.cvsp

This ad appeared while I was reading the article "Requiem." I felt a bit bleak after reading that article, but since it was tagged "Cancer," "Death," "Life," "Retirement," and "Sadness," that's probably okay, right?

+++

“Teeth”

You told me it hadn’t worked well- I asked, of course,
and you implied it had made a mess. I think that
isn’t your fault- not your fault for failure, and not your fault
for the idea. I don’t remember if you told me it
was yours, but I’d bet it was. It’s not a terrible idea, to
brush the teeth of a man
who is perfectly capable of brushing his own
and who does, or did, or was in the habit of doing so.

You shouldn’t have faced him while doing it- that was
your mistake. Try standing
behind him instead, in front of a mirror, looking over
his head if you’re tall enough, or over
his shoulder otherwise, and brushing
his teeth that way. I can remember
tying a tie on a man who couldn’t tie his own, and I
would stand behind him, with us
in front of a mirror, and that worked
well.

I want you to try again,
standing behind him this time. I think
that will be more natural- you’ll be
able to use some of the muscle
memory
you’ve developed over the decades you’ve brushed
your own teeth. You wouldn’t have the feeling,
the feedback, you have
when brushing your own teeth- and perhaps
it would be rather like
brushing your own teeth when you’re numb
from a cocktail of pharmaceuticals
that renders you sloppy, stumbling, uncoordinated,
but preserves-
even intensifies-
your interest in personal hygiene.

Try again- just work slowly, and be
careful
not to hurt him- you won’t hurt him, I
trust you.

+++

Peas out.

web guyz

2011-04-10T14:15:00.000-07:00

Berlin Photographs, Part 3

2011-04-06T18:46:00.000-07:00

Berlin Photographs, Part 3

This is the third set.

Click an image to view larger.

+++

"Scarf Smiles"

+++

"No Shit Sherlock"

+++

"Man In Leather Jacket With Matching Hair"

+++

"High Lights"

+++

"MacBeth And Such"

+++

"Dimple"

+++

"Young Man With Tag"

+++

"Semiprecious" (Note: this is not a differently-edited version of "Very Few Things Besides Lip Balm Work As Well As Advertised" although the subject is the same.)

+++

"Woman With Reichstag Reflected"

+++

"For A Fraction"

+++

Berlin Photographs, Part 2

2011-04-05T18:58:00.000-07:00

Berlin Photographs, Part 2

This is the next set.

Click on a photograph to see it larger.

+++

"Constructive"

+++

"Nickname"

+++

"Hartz Of Men"

+++

"In Living Memory Of Pirate Heme"

+++

"Cornrows"

+++

"Very Few Things Besides Lip Balm Work As Well As Advertised"

+++

"Turning Back"

+++

"If I Should Fall Behind"

+++

"What Is Justin Bieber?"

+++

"Martin Luther King Junior"

+++

Peas Out, V4L.

Berlin Photographs, Part 1

2011-04-04T21:53:00.000-07:00

Berlin Photographs, Part 1

Recently, I spent four days limping through the streets of Berlin, Germany’s capitol.

There are certain challenges to street photography in Berlin. Germany has some of the weakest freedom-of-speech protections and some of the strictest privacy laws in the European Union, and in Germany (unlike in the United States), it is illegal to photograph strangers without their permission. However, my interpretation of the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights (particularly Article 19, but also Articles 13, 20, 22, and 27) is that I have the irrevocable right to photograph anyone and anything anywhere in the world, irrespective of a subject’s consent and for any purpose whatsoever.

Practically speaking, Berlin is in some respects a better place for street photography than the American cities (Seattle, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and San Jose) where I’ve shot street. This is because Berlin is very safe; like most European Union cities, it has a violent crime rate about one-tenth as high as a typical American city. Overall, violent acts by civilians are the second-largest threat to a street photographer; oppressive actions by the police are a distant third.
Perhaps you are wondering what the greatest threat is.

It’s getting run over by a taxi, trust me.

A second positive characteristic of Berlin is that it lacks the sharp racial divisions of American cities. I walked through every quarter of the city (covering 15 to 20 miles per day), and although there are certain areas with a relatively high proportion of people of African or Middle Eastern descent, there’s nowhere in Berlin where a White person would stand out on the street. I doubt if there is a single block of the city where White people are less than 30% of the population. I stand out a great deal in the predominantly-Hispanic parts of San Jose and the predominantly-Black parts of Oakland, but in Berlin, as long as I kept my mouth shut, I didn’t stand out anywhere.
This isn’t to say that Berlin is racially homogenous; it’s a very diverse city, and it’s common to hear English, French, Italian, Turkish, Arabic, Russian, Hindi, and Chinese in many places. Berlin is simply much less segregated along visible racial lines than American cities. Interracial couples and families are the norm.

During the four days I spent in the city, I photographed perhaps 100 people per day. As such, it’s taking me some time to process all of my photographs. Here are a few of the first. I will be posting more in the coming days, along with travel tips which I hope will be helpful to anyone traveling to Berlin (and which I hope will induce people to travel to this excellent city).

Click an image to view larger.

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"Plum Beret"

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"Not My Cup Of Tea"

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"Totally Would, Even If She Had Bad Teeth And/Or Bad Credit"

Detail:

+++

"Mary Poppins"

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"Brohemia"

+++

"Soldier In Cherry Beret"

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"Hot Bro With The Brandenburg Gate Reflected"

Detail:

+++

"His Eyes Were Watching Gosh"

+++

"Women In Silk Headscarves With Sheen"

+++

"Tungsten And Inert Gas"

Detail:

+++

PO4N (Peas Out For Now).

2011-04-04T19:53:00.001-07:00

☺☺☺ SOCRAFT® KTV ☺☺☺

2011-04-03T20:21:00.000-07:00

Berlin Poghems

2011-03-24T21:08:00.001-07:00

Berlin Poghems

+++

“West”

We were there for the same reason:
You were standing on the corner because you were waiting to cross the street, and I-
I was also standing on the corner because you were waiting to cross the street.

+++

“Spree”

If you joined me in Berlin
in the morning
I would stand so your shadow fell on me.

If you joined me in Berlin
In the evening
I would stand so my shadow fell on you.

Always I would stand to the West of you
for you would love East Berlin
and East Berlin would love you
so
that to stand between the two of you would be
even by my
mad
standards
unsafe.

+++

“Miles of Glass”

I wanted you to love me and
so
when you opened the window to the cold
Berlin air
I pretended to approve; I told you
“Good, get some fresh air”
and you laughed
dug in your pockets
lit a cigarette
leaned out the window
breathed smoke towards the skyline
of a city
that is still dark at night:
across the street
is
a wall of flats twenty stories tall and
of
the hundreds of windows, only a handful
are lit. I count them.
Seven.

+++

“Carisomaprodol” (Car-E-so-map-row-doll)

He was in a bar and decided
to begin by saying
“Your hair is so blonde- it’s beautiful. I used
to be blonde, platinum blonde,
like
Paris Hilton.” But when
he walks up to her
he says
“I used to be Paris Hilton.”

+++

“Aerosol Paint”

Children born in the Nineties mistake
the fragments of the Berlin Wall for
Facebook.

networking event icebreakerz

2011-03-19T08:35:00.000-07:00

i was just trying to watch a second netflix movie

when a friend called me and invited me

to a party in the lower east side.

i said ok i'll be at the train in five min.

he was drunk and conversational.

on the train we talked about women i think.

we got beer for the party and went up

to the apartment. but, my friend was

mistaken about the party it was next week.

but we drank a beer there anyways and

talked about kissing women during sex

when you're not in love with them,

which was hard for my friend to do,

for some reason.

on the train back to brooklyn we talked about how

he perceived me having three personalities:

"just paying rent" "advertising meets ad busters" and "artist/hustler"

which was confusing to me because they all

seemed the same except maybe the ad busters thing,

which probably is just residual progressive education

interfering with my career. the i said

"oh my god what are my other personalities?"

and he said "i've never met your friends."

we drank the rest of the beer at my apartment

and listened to the cleaners from venus.

he went home and we agreed to possibly have

dinner later in the week. i looked at dump.fm

and drank the last beer. i thought, i'll clean

up my apartment in the morning.

2011-03-19T08:34:00.001-07:00

“Eleven Sixty-Seven” (A Poghem)

2011-03-12T23:03:00.000-08:00

“Eleven Sixty-Seven”

A bad blackout is like a bad childhood: you find yourself in pain, filth, and misery with only a dim memory of how things came to be so bad and the following selfish but unshakable conviction: because you cannot remember how this situation arose, you are absolved of responsibility for it.

That is the worst case. The best is that you wake in a mess of clothing and throw pillows on a clean hardwood floor (all the more impressive given that hardwood is so difficult to keep clean- moreso even than tile, and much moreso than carpet) and to your right is an orange curtain which holds back three-quarters each of the light, wind, and noise against it: just enough that you slept well, but not so much as to hide the reassuring reality that it is mid-day in San Francisco.

You have woken in the hand of a benevolent God, and although you don't know it, you said something you shouldn't have last night- nothing terrible, but a social faux pas- and He stepped in on your behalf. He excused your behavior by saying: "You have to remember, you're dealing with the raver generation here." It was a white lie, and He told it for you, and everyone laughed, and all was well.

You notice that one of the pillows is in fact a seat cushion. You find the chair that is missing its cushion, and tie the cushion on. You must have slept well: your hands are steady, no hint of a shake.

You tie a neat orange bow on the first try, with the loops exactly as long as the loose ends and exactly as long as each other.

“Spec Sheet” (A Short Poghem)

2011-03-09T12:58:00.000-08:00

“Spec Sheet”

the spec sheet begins

as all do:

by telling you that you are the proud

owner

of the best product

ever made, and

Do Not

Ingest

Disassemble

Reverse Engineer

Use in a Manner Inconsistent with the Labeling or in Violation of the Laws which Apply in the Country, State, Jurisdiction, or Community in Which You Reside

Expose to Excessive Temperatures

Freeze

Submerge

further it informs you

that with this product you can create something

“beautiful or brutal”

which seems strange

the use of “or”

as if beauty and brutality are somehow opposed

which seems absurd

as if a car can be White or European

a man can be Brunette or Tall

it can be Seven O’Clock or Raining.

didn't make the cut but i still kind of like it

2011-03-01T11:08:00.000-08:00

College One Show Club Award 2011 City Harvest

CW/Direct/Edit Erik Stinson

Late February Poghums

2011-03-01T00:11:00.000-08:00

“Saturday, the Twenty-Sixth February, Twenty-Eleven, Part One”

+++

“What’s that?”
“Water.”
“Oh, you don’t drink?”
“Oh, I do drink, but I also drink water.”
“Oh, yeah. Me, too, sometimes.”

+++

“Saturday, the Twenty-Sixth February, Twenty-Eleven, Part Two”

+++

You knew I was displeased, angry with myself. You wanted to soothe me.

“Oh well. Bad photos, but good friends.”

I smiled, and you believed me- my smile. I never believed you- what you had said.

Friends?

By the time you’re our age, friends will last maybe sixty years- sixty years if you chose friends who eat right, don’t drink, don’t smoke, get eight hours of sleep a night- and who the hell wants friends like that? I can see that we are aging already. The whites of your eyes are yellowing, slightly. They're a little yellower than mine, but my teeth are a little yellower than yours. I don't know if you bleach them. I don't think you do. I wouldn't give a damn either way. We are aging- our blood gives it away- the red iron. Iron rusts.

Photographs?

Photographs are made from silver. Photographs last for fucking ever. Silver never rusts.

holla inlaws

2011-02-28T12:05:00.001-08:00

*my parents don't regularly use marijuana

LIFE COLLAGE

2011-02-27T13:25:00.000-08:00

The Man Whose Name I Have Forgotten, or, Giacometti (A Poghem)

2011-02-22T18:23:00.000-08:00

The Man Whose Name I Have Forgotten

loved Giacometti
or perhaps he just loved saying “Giacometti”
he was that type
the New Yorker who was terrified of New York
and came to San Francisco
and was now equally terrified
of losing his New York accent
and it was good practice for him to say
Giacometti this, Giacometti that, Giacometti,
Giacometti.
It helped.

But I’m not giving him
enough credit- I should
be better to him, since I’ve already
forgotten his name. Then again
he promised to split parking with me when we went
to the Museum of Modern Art and
never did- I’ll call that
even.

Still I should be better
to him. He loved art, truly, he was the kind of man
who could stare at a single piece,
postmodern art, paint drizzled on canvas, even a solid blue canvas,
for hours.

We spent six hours at the Museum
and when I had walked through all the exhibits
and walked down from the fourth floor looking for him
to tell him it was time to leave
I found him
on the first floor
still
in the first room
still
standing.

Glass of Water in the Stockroom

2011-02-20T19:48:00.000-08:00

Glass of Water in the Stockroom (A Poghem)

Episode 2:
“I took his CDs out of my car.”
“Oh, yeah. Yeah, they might get stolen. That’s nice.”
“I don’t give a fuck if they get stolen, I just don’t want someone to break my windshield to get at them.”
“Your windshield is already broken.”
“Fuck you.”

Episode 1:
“I always lock the glove box so people don’t steal my CDs.”
“People don’t steal CDs. Not anymore. People don’t even listen to CDs anymore.”

Episode 0 (TXT MSGS):
“oh i see. guess i need to work on taking a hint. and u need to work on being more direct. whatevr. peas.”
“well u went to stanford u should know that classes n xtracurriculars come b4 hanging out w a cool guy in sf.”
“no question when i was at stnfrd i hardly had time 4 myself much less anyone else. looking back my priorities were fucked.”

FURTHER UPDATES AS SMS WARRANTS.

open up the store and let the money pile up

2011-02-08T15:51:00.000-08:00

GO: http://stores.lulu.com/ender_08athotmaildotcom

where its at

2011-02-06T09:55:00.000-08:00

"the big city can get lonely"

it says on a giant billboard overlooking

the church of jesus christ branding and advertising.

i was thinking i was a priest or a prophet

or at least somehow powerful.

countries make war on other countries

and countries are made by their internal

cultures. and internal cultures are made

by stories told by corporations and by

moms, to young kids. now im a power

mom with a loaded gun and a bottle

of bourbon and a nation of children,

mouths watering, ready to sink

teeth into a massive american burger.

i will tell them what it tastes like.

and then we go to war.

Fillmore Shoot

2011-02-04T22:18:00.000-08:00

Last night I was feeling "hella alternative" because I went to the Fillmore to shoot for a promoter after I got off work, which was an alternative to going to bed at 9:00. Chiddy Bang was performing. I guess they are underground because I didn't know what they looked like, so I Wikipedia'ed 'em earlier in the day while I was at work, but Wikipedia had no photograph, so I had to Google.

When I did the publicity shots there were "hella chickz" trying to "jump on" them (Figure 1).

However, the performers seemed completely impervious to their groupie's feminine charms (via pure, undiluted interracial workplace bromance) (Figures 2 and 3).

The people there were extremely alt, especially via braces, henna, iphones, metal signz, and having "jeeesus on their neck-uh-luss"es (Figure 4).

The event was being promoted by a company that rents textbooks or something to college kidz. They do something involving textbooks + internets, not sure if it is like netflix (sending physical books around by mail) or involves textbooks as e-books (for ur kindle, etc.) The company handed out free alt sunglasses to everyone at the concert, but because it was dark inside and about 30% of the people who arrived weren't stoned, a fair number of attendees found the glasses too dark and popped out the lenses, which littered the Fillmore floor (Figure 5).

Not sure if Chiddy Bang are "selling out" by being associated with the company. Maybe reading is hella alt. The company mascot is an egg. (Figure 6A).

This bro and this broette were "trying to have intercourse" but someone had vandalized the Wikipedia article on how to do it, and they got confused. Fortunately though, this bro is being "safe" (via sticking his tongue out the side of his mouth opposite the egg). Also note that the egg can see (via a burqua-like patch of cloth) (Figure 6B).

some links i've really been digin' lately

2011-02-01T13:09:00.000-08:00

http://www.applebees.com/menulanding.aspx

http://www.google.com/images?client=safari&rls=en&q=social+media+wizard&oe=UTF-8&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=og&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi&biw=1354&bih=671

http://erikstinson.tumblr.com/post/3049292014/and-then-i-disappeared-again-writing-by-erik

http://soundcloud.com/rnbmillionaires/girls

dump.fm

http://oaklandvideo.blogspot.com

http://hologramcity.blogspot.com/

Theater Curtain Blues and Other Poghems

2011-01-31T21:36:00.000-08:00

1. “Smog Test”

You don’t understand

how hard it is to be turned

on by tattoos

and

off by vegetarians

and

live in the san

francisco bay.

+++

2. “Closed Things”

when I am alive I look

at myself, the people I know

and think

damn, if people like us were in charge

the world would be fucked

but then I remember that the world

is indeed

fucked

and sleep.

+++

3. "Theater Curtain Blues"

even though you tell me

about problems I have no way to fix

my hands are cold, hmm,

the hell am I supposed to do about that

strike me hard when you see

an out-of-state license plate

even while I am driving,

in fact usually while I am driving

insist it is a lie that I’ve ever seen

someone with darker red hair

you say you are the reddest

of the headest

burn off my film making photographs of

flowers that are bound to be trite

I had hoped that once you learned to focus you would take off

down the street chasing interesting-looking strangers

won’t sing along with me when we meet my old friend, tell him

we are seeing prints at Fort Mason Center and he thinks we mean Prince

Raspberry

beret

somehow you put everything in order in this city

where if you want brutal revenge on anyone, to see them suffer until

you have to turn away

you need only face them and stand

very still.

2011-01-29T12:53:00.001-08:00

2011-01-25T09:34:00.000-08:00

Post your 2011 Resolutions

2011-01-03T13:15:00.000-08:00

New Year’s Resolutions for 2011:

-Get entirely out of debt.

-Exercise more, at least 5% as much as Bobby does.

-Dress like Chris K., because, if you want to get ahead in the world/bar, you need to be noticed. Erik won’t agree with this. He doesn’t understand, because he doesn’t need to do anything to get noticed. He’s like David (hipster version). Bobby understands, though he can dress normally. He’s like David (Michelangelo version). I’m not, okay?

-Take the San Francisco art world by storm. Get prints of my brotos in galleries by following Erik’s guidelines and ranting about how I know Chihuly and met him at a Microsoft-run art camp, even though such a claim is completely inconsistent with my age relative to Chihuly’s. If anyone questions me regarding this, make insulting statements about Chihuly’s personal hygiene to change the subject. My target is Minna Gallery, downtown.

-Tell everyone I meet that I’m 30, if they ask.

-Conquer my fear of the internet.

-Learn to actually cook.

-Watch TV and try to become habituated to at least one show.

-Yell more often, but say nicer things.

-Take care of my health, specifically by smoking less (to avoid lung cancer/higher health insurance rates) and by stretching before I go out dancing (to avoid pulled muscles).

-Improve posture. Keep my head up and stand up straight, even when it is raining.

-Replace the bulbs in my headlights so I don’t have to drive around with my high-beams on all the time at night.

-Take fewer, better photos rather than more, worse photos. Quality over quantity. Bro XXXploitation over all else. Put photos of friends online more quickly, but also try to make friends with people who are patient (preferably: beautiful women who are old enough to remember having to wait for film to be developed).

-Become cured of all third-world diseases (April 18!) and do not use cessation of antibiotics as an excuse to get excessively crunk off in the club. Remember, driving is WAY better than drinking.

+++

Okay, these are mine. Post yours.

Best of 2010 List

2010-12-19T14:18:00.000-08:00

Overall:
1. Sports Bars
2. Working hard
3. New Age Music
4. Spicy foods
5. Outdoor Clothing
6. Being a father

Music:
1. Fishkind
2. Bruce Springsteen
3. Poison
4. Destroyer
5. Odd Future

Movies:
1. Fraz Otto
2. Movies based on Christmas Cards
3. Movies about music videos
4. Movies about extreme social behaviors that I watched at Dirt Empire
5. The X-Files on Netflix

Writers:
1. Miles Ross
2. Amazon.com production descriptions
3. Did the Old Spice guy write his own stuff? I guess not?
5. Jimmy Buffett

Bitches:
1. Dark haired girls
2. Science girls
3. Internet girls
4. Punks
5. Girls on trains
6. To do the dishes
7. To clean up my room

Parts of NYC:
1. New Jersey
2. Philly
3. Bushwick
4. Midtown
5. Key West

Parts of America:
1. Bay Area
2. Oakland
3. Bushwick
4. Mexico

Bars:
1. Ruby Room Oakland
2. Two Eighty Cafe & Lounge Brooklyn
3. My apartments
4. Lucky Dog Williamsburg
5. Arlene's Grocery LES

eternal hunger

2010-12-06T12:01:00.000-08:00

on days when i
get sick and stay
home i loose my
appetite for blood.
i want to watch
my entire life
on netflix instant.
1156 years of
love and death.

pics of my new book

2010-12-06T06:47:00.001-08:00

pre-Feb copies may be available to certain people...

Places I Want To Interview

2010-11-29T06:31:00.000-08:00

By then I will have a BA in English Theory and a certificate in Writing For Advertising. My experience is mostly in brand communications, web, and graphics with heavy emphasis both on both high-level thinking and detail-level production. My allegiences are to academic Marxism, punk rock, and internet culture.

Google Creative Labs (Duh)
Anomaly NYC
Virtue NYC/London (Vice)
Pereira & O'Dell NYC
Ogilvy NYC
Taxi NYC
W+K Portland
Quaker City Mercantile
Cutwater SF
4Chan (call me Chris: Stefan and Ryder both have my number)

Yeah internet, so if you know anybody who want to talk let me know.

erikstinson.com for brand stuff
erikstinson.biz for non-commercial writing and graphics

Divisidero

2010-11-28T18:40:00.000-08:00

“Divisidero / The Mission / The Marina / The Pier”

I am not going to discuss how I produced these images beyond noting that it involved a camera and balls.

In the style of Dat Magazine’s recent article, I have a single overarching suggestion to photographers:

Avoid photographing that which is, or those who are, “designated” to be photographed. Do not photograph models, monuments, art, tourist attractions, or performers. In fact, do not photograph anything that is designated “for looking at,” even if it is not designated “for photographing” and even if photography is prohibited. Try to keep your lenscap on within 10 meters of any signs suggesting a photo opportunity (once known as a “Kodak Moment” but now renamed out of respect for Fuji).

Before you photograph anything or anyone, ask yourself “would a tourist photograph this?” If the answer is “yes,” then rethink your choice. Try to take the photographs that tourists would be too frightened or disinterested to take. Turn the tables; make the observer the observed.

These are unedited, not even cropped. I hope to improve some of them significantly in post-production; most of them I will toss aside.

+++

Click an image to view larger.

+++

"Hmph."

+++

"Red Highlights Are Me"

+++

"Yawns Are Contagious"

+++

"Power Climber"

+++

"I am not going to take off my glasses"

+++

"When You Smoke, You Always Have Something To Do"

+++

"Sign That Is Too Heavy To Steal If You Happen To Be Carrying A Tripod And Camera But Probably Not Otherwise"

+++

"Down To Purchase Some Organic Foods"

+++

"I'm Not Taking Off My Glasses, Either"

+++

"Just Chillin 'At The Marina, Takin' Pixxx Of Some Sea-Gulls, U Know How We Do"

+++

"Sure Is Squinty Out Today"

+++

"Oh Snap I Can See San Fran Disco From Here, P.S. I Look Like Carsten Sc. From Overlake"

+++

"Red Peacoat"

+++

"Man With Silver And Dark Hair"

+++

"Probably Three Bows"

+++

"Fire Hydrant"

+++

"I Coordinate My Sunglasses And Purse Lining"

+++

"Not Sure What Is Going On Here, But It Looks Pretty Complicated And Girl On The Right Looks Like Brittany De. From The University Of Washington"

+++

"Aspherical"

+++

"Shamen Reloaded"

+++

"Yes We Can / Wear Ray-Ban!" or "Hope: Take A Picture So It Will Last Longer"

+++

"Her Eyes Were Watching God"

+++

"Gold And Silver And Porcelain And Water"

+++

"Chillin' By The Giant Topiary Menorah"

+++

"Got To Take Some Pixxx Of These Traffic Conez"

+++

"Gere"

+++

"Aliens Told Me To Be Chill"

+++

"The Internal Revenue Service"

+++

"Gots To Get Some Pixx Wit My Sony (TM) CyberShot (TM)"

+++

"Thank Goodness There Are Chill Bros To Help Me Unzip My Wetsuit So I Can Go Snorkeling In San Francisco Bay In November At Age 70"

+++

"Used To Be Emo And Cut My Wrists But Now Feelin' Chill Because I Got This String In My Hands And Faith In My Heart That On The Other End There Is A Net Full Of Tasty Crabz"

+++

"Got A Crab And He Looks Tasty But Kind Of Pissed Off"

+++

Erik: Plz write poghems about these peeps.

Remember: Photography is a right, not a privilege. It is your civil right to photograph anything and anyone you can legally see.

V4L,
-A2

futuristic jobs

2010-11-22T10:15:00.000-08:00

brand ethics activist
modular computer retail associate
urban renewal event marketer
career upgrade social media educator
food designer
chief offensive officer, 'brand commando'
social media director of a recycling center
recyclable-messaging social media researcher

these won't be published anywhere else untill 'and then i disappeared again' comes on in feb

2010-11-17T07:48:00.001-08:00

sluts, get a grip

after three years of spending all his
free time on the internet erik97
decided it was time to take a break.
he locked his computer in a closet
and walked outside. he threw the
keys into a nearby stream. back
inside his house, he felt very alone.
his microwave had a luminous,
imaginative glow that seemed new.
then, his refrigerator text messaged
him that he had leftover chinese
food. he was so surprised that he
almost ran through his sliding
glass doors. he clutched the
sustainable chinese food package
very tightly.

glass door

orange november sun hovers
against a cabinet. i leave a bedroom
window open to feel the alien
winter breeze. in about an hour
the evening mediafeeds will
start and i will be paralyzed by
organic pasta. the sun goes
away and the air becomes icy.
i shut the window.

newsfeed

nobody is working because
a popular musician has just
release a free album online.
they think, 'i will be more
productive when this album
is done archiving and i have
a fresh cup of coffee.' there
is a stillness that reminds
us of that time when everyone
had to read a juicy gossip
blog story. the cubes were
like an ancient tomb for two
minutes. the office plants
looked likes pieces of an
alter to an internet god.

to live and die in the shadow of the twin towers

2010-11-14T12:05:00.001-08:00

by erik stinson 2010 nyc

Folding Things

2010-11-08T20:52:00.001-08:00

0. Whatevs: Remember CK’s “poke-farming”? Yeah.

1. The Economy: On Sunday I went to the Homes Depot in East Palo Alto to get a surveyor’s tripod (the kind one uses to support a level, theodolite, rangefinder, or other surveying equipment) and aerosol paint. Surprisingly, the orange-vest-clad employees were actually able to tell me where to find these items. I was shocked. Working at The Homes Depot sucks, as I know first-hand. In a healthy economy, employee turnover at hardware stores is high enough to completely preclude anyone on the store floor having any idea where the fuck anything is. The economy must be so bad that sales associates, who make minimum wage and suffer continuous occupational exposure to contractors (“occupational exbrosure”), actually stay around long enough to learn what products the store carries and where they are located. I remembered cashiering at the Homes Depot in Bellevue years ago; whenever cashiers sold aerosol paint, we were supposed to card the customers to make sure they were over 18 and not Banksky. However, it was much faster to just type in November 11th, 1111 as a customer birthdate, and all the cashiers at the Bellevue Homes Depot, including myself, did exactly that. When I bought the spraypaint, I saw the cashier key in the date November 11th, 1111 for me. Deja faire.

It was wonderfully cheap. Three dollars for a one-pound can of fluorescent yellow industrial-strength enamel spraypaint. The spraypaint even had a label describing all the different Chemicals Known to the State of California to Wreck Your Shit, which I enjoyed decoding.

+++

2. Freezer: There is more film than food in my freezer, which is chill, I guess. The Nikon FG is great. It’s small, heavy, fast, loud, subtle, indestructible, and black. These days, film is associated with hipsters and the unspeakably annoying medium of “lomography.” Getting messy results with film is easy; digital cameras are designed to be operated by the ignorant, and so people who want messy results prefer film because it’s so much easier to mess up. It’s cool to be lazy and not put any effort into anything, even into messing something up.

I like film because it’s so hard to get right (much harder than digital) and so much better when you do get it right (much better than digital). This allows me to do “hella neurotic” photography as an antithesis to “lomo”. Chill. I’ll rarely pull the shutter release on the FG unless there is a chance that everything is perfect. Film is fucking expensive.

+++

3. Rain: I was walking to one of Stanford’s libraries in the pouring rain. There were two twenty-something bros in front of me. I caught a bit of their conversation:

“I guess, I mean, I’m fine, but I’m not a gynecologist or anything,” one bro said, in a monotone. The other muttered “mmm” in a sober, sympathetic tone. They both looked sad and were staring down at the brick with water running off their gelled hair.

Perhaps I should carry a sound recorder rather than a camera.

+++

4. Route 280: There are three kinds of places in the world: places where I won’t get shot, places where I’ll get shot if I take pictures of tattooed bros, and places where I’ll get shot just for walking down the street. However, being A2, I have an ingenious plan to turn all places into Type 1. I think I may even be able to shoot on private property, which would be nice: Stanford’s campus doesn’t have a particularly high concentration of “interesting-looking” people, but it’s by far the most densely-populated area in Palo Alto, and so the sheer number of bros milling around boosts my odds. Mais, comme toutes-jours, on vera…

+++

5. Nectar Wine Bar, Divisidero, San Francisco, 1AM:

“I think she’s impulsive.”

“Well, I’m impulsive. I mean, if someone wanted to go skydiving, I’d be like ‘hell yeah!’. I want to go skydiving, bungee jumping…”

“Yeah, but say you went to the bar, you met some guy, he seemed really cool, like perfect, and he said, ‘hey, let’s drive to Vegas and get married, my car’s outside.’ Would you do it?”

“Uh, no.”

“See, that’s what I mean. There’s impulsive and then there’s that.”

“We’re not like that.”

“No.”

+++

6. Peas Corps: It has come to my attention that one of the members of the Prestigious Overlake Class of 2006, miss Hayley Dr., is doing Peas Corps service in Africa, AKA “the ghetto where teabaggers think Obama was born”. I get special enjoyment whenever I learn that someone who “belongs in the ghetto even less than me, if you can believe that” is “going to the ghetto”. Usually this happens through programs like the Peas Corps and Bleach America. Hopefully she will take kickass pictures, write good poghems, seems possible. The best part of her blog thus far, however, is a disclaimer which states: “The contents of this website are mine personally and do not reflect any position of the U.S. government or the Peas Corps.” In fact I think we should add this to Menthol in order to keep people from confusing us with the official spokesmen of the White House. It happens a lot. I also think that Peas Corps may be a genre in need of expansion, alongside foamcore, mumblecore, and pizzacore.

+++

“i slept with this writer erik stinson and it was whatevs” social media promotion

2010-11-07T11:10:00.000-08:00

babe alert!

i’m having a promotion next week.

anyone who tweets

“i slept with this writer erik stinson @erikhaspresence and it was whatevs but i got a book. you can too, just tweet this.”

will get my second book ‘i’m happy that you are grappling with my lifechoices’ for printing cost+shipping. i will send you the secret link.

also

you can update your facebook status to read

“i slept with this writer erik stinson and it was whatevs but i got a book. you can too just repost this and message him.”

fb message me and i will send you the link. yeah. my second book. it’s ok. i think it will end up being like 5 dollars total.

starts monday and 12am. i will post this on fb and twitter.

also, my next (4th) collection ‘and then i disappeared again’ will be released february 1st 2011, either by menthol u.p. or by someone else… also, ‘futureism’ is doing well. seems like maybe it got me another gallery show (tba) in nyc.

thanks guys

erik

bushwick ny november 2010

Things I am Currently Looking Forward To

2010-11-03T10:08:00.000-07:00

1. Seeing Tron, probably alone, in an anonymous Manhattan theater.

2. Starting in January, I won't need to wake up early. So, not waking up as early.

3. Visiting my mother's family in Denver in December. Eating food with them and with my parents and sister.

4. Trying to keep my houseplant alive.

5. Getting a real job with a tax form.

6. Writing observational things in Tumblr.

7. Babes alerts.

8. Writing more TV commercials.

9. Reading the rest of Joan Didion's novels.

10. Hanging out with my sister on her birthday in Seattle.

11. The seeing the final cut of Martin Luther King Junior Way.

MGMT VISUALS BY DUMP.FM+ERIK STINSON (and others) LAST NIGHT

2010-10-26T12:32:00.000-07:00

PHOTOS FROM DUMP.FM IRL 319 Scholes BUSHWICK NY

2010-10-23T11:24:00.000-07:00

Speak Directly To The Consumer via Spokes-Animal

2010-10-21T14:18:00.001-07:00

a blog exhibit by erik stinson, 2010

going to write more about my childhood maybe

2010-10-18T07:42:00.001-07:00

Death In Autumn: Two Short Stories

2010-10-17T23:50:00.000-07:00

Death in Autumn: Two Short Stories

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1. “Wax”

Once upon a time, a man went to a garage sale and bought two candles. They were matching, but had been burned to different lengths. This bothered him, and so when he arrived home, he lit the taller candle and placed it on his kitchen counter. He set the shorter candle next to it, such that he would be able to judge when the taller candle had burned down sufficiently and could be extinguished.

It was a Sunday, and he had been out late the night before. He felt tired, and took a nap. When he woke, he found that the (initially) taller candle had burned down so far that it was in fact now shorter than the other candle. He blew it out, put on his jacket, walked down the street, and jumped in front of the CalTRAIN. He died instantly.

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2. “Clipboard”

Once upon a time, a man was walking past a stairwell which lead down, below the street level, into the basement of an apartment building. Mr. Morales walked from the bottom of the stairwell up toward the street, stopping three stairs below the street level. Mr. Morales was carrying a clipboard. Neither of the men had ever seen each other. It was autumn.

“If you had to describe yourself in one word, what would it be?,” Mr. Morales asked the man.

The man thought for several seconds, scratching his chin and muttering “hmm...”

“Old-fashioned,” the man said.

“That is two words,” Mr. Morales said.

“Oh. But it’s a compound word, with a hyphen...,” the man said. He started to think of another word, again scratching his chin and muttering.

Mr. Morales set the clipboard down on one of the steps of the stairwell, but it started to tip. The steps were not wide enough to accommodate the entire clipboard. Mr. Morales rearranged the clipboard so the heavy metal clip was as far forward on the step as possible, with the lighter part of the clipboard hanging off the step. This kept the clipboard from tipping. His hands empty, Mr. Morales removed a revolver from a holster hidden under his jacket.

Mr. Morales aimed at the man’s chin. Mr. Morales closed his eyes and tucked his lips into his mouth a moment before he pulled the trigger, because he did not know if the man’s blood might spatter onto him, and although the man did not have hepatitis or HIV, Mr. Morales did not know this. All he knew was that the man had described himself in two words when explicitly instructed to describe himself in one word. Mr. Morales shot the man. He died instantly.

+++

Next, on Menthol University Press:

1. Stories about neat freaks: being neurotic isn't as simple or straightforward as you might think.
2. The word "Girl" has the abbreviation "IRL" ("In Real Life") in it. Coincidence?
3. Did you know that Germans refer to the constellation we call "The Big Dipper" with a phrase that translates literally as "The Big Cart"? Well, now you do!
4. Sometimes, you see someone and want to sleep with them. If they're wearing a fedora hat (or if any of their friends are), it's quite straightforward: just walk up to them and ask "Excuse me, is the word 'fedorable' in your vocabulary?" It's pretty easy from there.
5. As people get older, they tend to become less idealistic. My level of idealism is about equivalent to that of the average seven-thousand-year-old.
6. I am starting to no longer believe in things that can't be assigned units. I still halfway believe in things like distance and filmspeed and vehicle speed--but what about things like love, truth, and Australia? They have no units, so their existence is suspect.

October

2010-10-12T08:22:00.000-07:00

I have been interviewed by Print Libaration Philadelphia PA

2010-10-07T11:48:00.000-07:00

http://printliberation.com/blog/

Death On Broadway: Three Seattle Poghems

2010-10-05T22:49:00.000-07:00

Death On Broadway: Three Seattle Poghems

Hello Menthol readers,

Below are three short poghems inspired by my recent week-long jaunt to Seattle. They should tide y’all over until I get the rest of my film processed

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1. “Brand Loyalty”

I am end

lessly pleased

with PhotoShopAfterEffectsInDesign

the consistency

of the products with each

of my intentions and each

other.

Adobe should

diversify and

make ColognePastaStreetDrugs.

Have you

tried the new

CS6?

I put on some CS6

went to a club, did some CS6

met someone, fell in love,

we went back to my place,

ate some CS6

and lived creatively ever after

in a suite.

+++

2. “SeaTac”

Two men behind me

are speaking African French

I join in: Vous venez d’ou, where

do you come from?

A young woman

turns at my French

tells me: You

should do that more often.

I am fairly

sure she is beautiful and very

sure she is wrong.

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3. “Gear”

Everyone is moving in

with everyone else

he moves so often he

is hard to find or

to avoid.

If he asks me why I

pay for dental work in cash I will

say “because of global

warming” if he asks me why I

didn’t write a check I will

say “because I had to

drive” if he asks me if

i am growing my hair out I will

say “yes would you like

to have a race?”